So you may've noticed that I sometimes forget the Quote of the Day, so I am changing it to the Quote of Whenever I Find One Worth Posting (a little lengthy but more truthful)on todays QOWIFOWP comes from the Awesome and lamentably deceased FREDDIE MERCURY!!
"I won't be a rock star. I will be a legend."
That's awesome.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Last weekend was unawesome
So I am just getting around to posting about my last weekend. It kinda sucked, played some Warcraft didn't advance very much, slept a lot but still felt tired, and other annoying things of that nature.
Also, I didn't win the $43,000,000.00 from the 6/49 that I believe the Lottery Gods should've had earmarked for yours truly, but no they gave it to THREE people from Ontario, how cruel is it to brake up that much money? I would've given all $43,000,000.00 a good home. Perhaps it's my punishment, for my fickle lottery ticket love, like those guys that suddenly switch their favorite hockey team cause the team is suddenly a blondie away from winning the Stanley Cup, and there's 1 minute left in the game and buddies new team is leading by one point, and he's on the edge of his seat waiting to gloat to his friends that his team WON THE STANLEY CUP, and the centre for the opposing team is skating down the ice ready to test the awesomeness of the young goalie that hasn't let a singel goal in ALL game when said goalie suddenly trips on his pads soars across the ice at light speed, crashes through the boards and ends up with his head under the referees wifes skirt (which wouldn't be at all fun for out young goalie, cause most referees are old and their wives are likely to be also)So not only does he let the goal in, the referees give the opposing team a penalty for the young goalies gross perversion, and despite being both dazed and confused from crashing through the boards and also viewing what the young goalie sees as the oldest lady bits in history, Coach Dumbass sends him out to goal against the Penalty Shot cause he's only missed one goal, and just as the guy taking the shot slaps the puck, our young goalie succumbs to his massive head wound and collapses as the puck sails into the net, and Buddies new Team LOSES!! And the Hockey Gods (and his friends) laugh at him.
That's like what happened to my lottery ticket winnings, I offended the Lottery Gods, by only buying a ticket when there is big money involved, a complete lack of loyalty and the said "We'll see about that!! Where were you when we gave away $4,000,000.00 last month?!" And in my head they sound just like Donald Trump.
That is all.
Also, I didn't win the $43,000,000.00 from the 6/49 that I believe the Lottery Gods should've had earmarked for yours truly, but no they gave it to THREE people from Ontario, how cruel is it to brake up that much money? I would've given all $43,000,000.00 a good home. Perhaps it's my punishment, for my fickle lottery ticket love, like those guys that suddenly switch their favorite hockey team cause the team is suddenly a blondie away from winning the Stanley Cup, and there's 1 minute left in the game and buddies new team is leading by one point, and he's on the edge of his seat waiting to gloat to his friends that his team WON THE STANLEY CUP, and the centre for the opposing team is skating down the ice ready to test the awesomeness of the young goalie that hasn't let a singel goal in ALL game when said goalie suddenly trips on his pads soars across the ice at light speed, crashes through the boards and ends up with his head under the referees wifes skirt (which wouldn't be at all fun for out young goalie, cause most referees are old and their wives are likely to be also)So not only does he let the goal in, the referees give the opposing team a penalty for the young goalies gross perversion, and despite being both dazed and confused from crashing through the boards and also viewing what the young goalie sees as the oldest lady bits in history, Coach Dumbass sends him out to goal against the Penalty Shot cause he's only missed one goal, and just as the guy taking the shot slaps the puck, our young goalie succumbs to his massive head wound and collapses as the puck sails into the net, and Buddies new Team LOSES!! And the Hockey Gods (and his friends) laugh at him.
That's like what happened to my lottery ticket winnings, I offended the Lottery Gods, by only buying a ticket when there is big money involved, a complete lack of loyalty and the said "We'll see about that!! Where were you when we gave away $4,000,000.00 last month?!" And in my head they sound just like Donald Trump.
That is all.
Premptive Flame Supressant
Allow me to point out, before anyone gets upset about the mean things I wrote in my previous post, that I am a chubby girl, I am not trying to lower anyones self esteem, I am just pointing out that making yourself look fatter really won't help the self esteem thing.
Having said that, Do you really care that much what I or anyone else thinks? And if you do I heartily suggest learning to recognize assholes for what the are: Brainless orifices from which feces is expelled, so the next time some asshole talks shit about you STUFF A ROLL OF TOILET PAPER IN THEIR ORIFICE!!
Having said that, Do you really care that much what I or anyone else thinks? And if you do I heartily suggest learning to recognize assholes for what the are: Brainless orifices from which feces is expelled, so the next time some asshole talks shit about you STUFF A ROLL OF TOILET PAPER IN THEIR ORIFICE!!
The Dichotomy of Good and Evil: or why fat chicks shouldn't wear tights!
Does anyone else feel that the purchasing and wearing of tights, leggings, and skinny jeans should be better regulated? That there should be guidelines or even laws for purchasing these products?
I submit for your approval Awesome Miries Guide for Buying and Wearing Skinny Chick Duds:
1: All people attempting to purchase any of the above mentioned leg coverings must submit to a body fat percentage test… Anyone over a certain percentage (like 10) should NOT be allowed to purchase these products.
2: If you are over the age of 30 (unless you have a body fat percentage of like 5 and have never put your body through the horror of having children) do not buy these products.
3: Please ensure that if you meet the above criteria that the products fit properly, camel toe and the perpetual wedgie are even less attractive in tights and leggings, then they are in jeans.
4: If you’re a bit of a chunky monkey or older than you should be and you insist on buy these products, be sure to pair them with a top that will completely cover your body flaws, such as a dimply bum, cottage cheese thighs, or cankles. An example of a proper Chunky Chick leggings outfit, is a lovely mid thigh, or just above the knee length sweater dress, or skirt, and a pair of knee high heeled boots that will hide those cankles, observe:
Picture taken from here: http://www.stylehive.com/bookmark/Women-Womens-Cowl-neck-sweater-dress-Dresses-Dresses--Gap-248487
Now, obviously, this model is not chunky, nor does she have obvious cankles, but lets face it do you know how hard it is to find a decent picture of a plus sized model in a sweater dress? Come on.
5: Also anyone over the age of 15 MUST stay away from these: (unless it’s for Halloween)
Or similar obnoxiously coloured products.
Picture comes from here: http://girldir.com/street-style/what-do-girls-wear-these-days
I submit for your approval Awesome Miries Guide for Buying and Wearing Skinny Chick Duds:
1: All people attempting to purchase any of the above mentioned leg coverings must submit to a body fat percentage test… Anyone over a certain percentage (like 10) should NOT be allowed to purchase these products.
2: If you are over the age of 30 (unless you have a body fat percentage of like 5 and have never put your body through the horror of having children) do not buy these products.
3: Please ensure that if you meet the above criteria that the products fit properly, camel toe and the perpetual wedgie are even less attractive in tights and leggings, then they are in jeans.
4: If you’re a bit of a chunky monkey or older than you should be and you insist on buy these products, be sure to pair them with a top that will completely cover your body flaws, such as a dimply bum, cottage cheese thighs, or cankles. An example of a proper Chunky Chick leggings outfit, is a lovely mid thigh, or just above the knee length sweater dress, or skirt, and a pair of knee high heeled boots that will hide those cankles, observe:
Picture taken from here: http://www.stylehive.com/bookmark/Women-Womens-Cowl-neck-sweater-dress-Dresses-Dresses--Gap-248487
Now, obviously, this model is not chunky, nor does she have obvious cankles, but lets face it do you know how hard it is to find a decent picture of a plus sized model in a sweater dress? Come on.
5: Also anyone over the age of 15 MUST stay away from these: (unless it’s for Halloween)
Or similar obnoxiously coloured products.
Picture comes from here: http://girldir.com/street-style/what-do-girls-wear-these-days
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
NDP Supporters shouldn't read this: Also I will probably ramble extensively
"NDP Leader Jack Layton has already said he will vote against the government's latest budget because he believes a coalition would serve the country better.
However, Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff, who succeeded Dion, has not appeared keen on that idea. He has said he wants to see what's in the budget, and won't say whether he will support it until Wednesday."
This quote comes from here: http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2009/01/26/budgetadvancer.html
Let me start by saying that Jack Layton is an attention power whoring asshole.
Parliament is back in session today, and the Conservatives are going to be presenting their new budget plans, I for one am looking forward to seeing how they are planning to get us through the US caused world recetion. As stated in the above article, they are planning to spend money to the point of a severe deficit, which we haven't had since 1996-97; I am actually encouraged by this and I will tell you why:
I am by no means an economic expert (seriously I can barely keep track of my own finances)but at first it seemed to me that 64 billion dollars over 2 years is a HELLA LOT OF MONEY!! It actually isn't that much, for our estimated population of 33,534,000 (per Wikipedia) that's only $1,908.51 per person, which wouldn't last the average Canadian household very long, and it would help people on EI and Welfare even less, but by investing it in the Canadian industries, it creates jobs and security for many Canadians, the proposed tax cut also contributes to making things easier. Also, would not investing in Canadian industries boost our exports and things? Increasing the money Canada is bringing in? and leave us in a better place to get rid of the deficit when the recetion is over (hopefulyl soon)? Makes sense to me. Isn't the old adage "You have to spend money to make money"? Besides it worked for Hitler.
Also, as for the bit about Jack Layton, and the quote from article, how childish is it that old Jackie boy has already decided to vote against the new budget even before he's heard all of it? This is someone who wants to have a hand in running our country? It's all well and good for him to vote against the budget cause it doesn't effect his bottom line, no politician in the history of the modern world has ever been laid off or not gotten paid, or had to worry about how he was going to feed/cloth/shelter his family. This is all about him wanting to FINALLY be in a position of power, and lets face it can anyone remember the last time the NDP being in power was a good thing?
As for the good people of BC, how about having ICBC get off their asses and start giving back some of it's enormous profits, a brake in insurance premiums would certainly be helpful to someone like me who pays $250.00 per month.
Your thoughts?
However, Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff, who succeeded Dion, has not appeared keen on that idea. He has said he wants to see what's in the budget, and won't say whether he will support it until Wednesday."
This quote comes from here: http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2009/01/26/budgetadvancer.html
Let me start by saying that Jack Layton is an attention power whoring asshole.
Parliament is back in session today, and the Conservatives are going to be presenting their new budget plans, I for one am looking forward to seeing how they are planning to get us through the US caused world recetion. As stated in the above article, they are planning to spend money to the point of a severe deficit, which we haven't had since 1996-97; I am actually encouraged by this and I will tell you why:
I am by no means an economic expert (seriously I can barely keep track of my own finances)but at first it seemed to me that 64 billion dollars over 2 years is a HELLA LOT OF MONEY!! It actually isn't that much, for our estimated population of 33,534,000 (per Wikipedia) that's only $1,908.51 per person, which wouldn't last the average Canadian household very long, and it would help people on EI and Welfare even less, but by investing it in the Canadian industries, it creates jobs and security for many Canadians, the proposed tax cut also contributes to making things easier. Also, would not investing in Canadian industries boost our exports and things? Increasing the money Canada is bringing in? and leave us in a better place to get rid of the deficit when the recetion is over (hopefulyl soon)? Makes sense to me. Isn't the old adage "You have to spend money to make money"? Besides it worked for Hitler.
Also, as for the bit about Jack Layton, and the quote from article, how childish is it that old Jackie boy has already decided to vote against the new budget even before he's heard all of it? This is someone who wants to have a hand in running our country? It's all well and good for him to vote against the budget cause it doesn't effect his bottom line, no politician in the history of the modern world has ever been laid off or not gotten paid, or had to worry about how he was going to feed/cloth/shelter his family. This is all about him wanting to FINALLY be in a position of power, and lets face it can anyone remember the last time the NDP being in power was a good thing?
As for the good people of BC, how about having ICBC get off their asses and start giving back some of it's enormous profits, a brake in insurance premiums would certainly be helpful to someone like me who pays $250.00 per month.
Your thoughts?
Monday, January 26, 2009
When I Rule the World:
1. All my subjects will refer to me as the Empress of Awesomeness
2. No Drag Queen will be allowed to be prettier than me, I can handle a chick being prettier than me, but a dude dressed as a chick might be too much for my queenly self esteem to handle.
3. Any drag queen that commits the above crime will be forced to where their grandmothers clothing… from the 80’s, with big chunky head bands (for a year)
4. All religions will be reviewed by a panel of unbiased judges (atheists) and if found to be harmful to anyone besides members of their own religion will be abolished. I say members of their own religion because if you’re crazy enough to consent to something like running bare assed between two rows of people with studded paddles smacking said bare ass as your initiation you deserve it (as long as your over 18). NOTHING that either directly or indirectly harms a child will be permitted.
5. Anyone caught correcting the Empress of Awesomeness or ‘advising’ her of an error on her part will result in the immediate and humiliating punishment of 40 lashes with a wet noodle. (A second offense will result in the perpetrator forced to dance naked through streets of Awesomeland singing Miley Cyrus songs… I’m not joking, unless your super fat, cause nobody wants to see that)
6. Any previously unheard word that comes from the Empress mouth will be immediately posted on dictionary.com with whatever meaning the Empress says it has, so that everyone may enjoy the gems of wisdom that issue from the twisted cavern of her mind.
7. Everyone will be required by law to acknowledge that the Niece of Awesomeness (known to some as Kayleen) is the cutest, smartest, most perfect, little lady that ever there was. (Failure to do this may result in your expulsion from the Awesome planet [previously known as Earth] via the Empresses size twelve boot in your ass [seriously dudes, you’ll end up in the stratosphere])
8. All crimes committed will be severely punished. Seriously, it will mildly nicer than Vlad the Impaler
9. Whatever the Niece of Awesomeness wants, she gets, period.
10. School to at least grade 12 will be Mandatory, there is no excuse for illiteracy.
11. World Hunger will be abolished, by any means necessary
12. Research will be focused on cures for current incurable ailments, and the prevention of catching those incurable ailments, anyone caught creating any type virus or illness will NOT like the consequences
13. There will be a limit to how much any one person can earn in wages per year, no one needs to earn $25 million dollars a year, when there are children starving to death the world over.
14. Every country in the world will use the same currency, and all foods, will hold the same dollar value no matter where it comes from
15. All people will be entitled to not just the basic needs of life, everyone should have enough money for ample food, clean water, clothing, and shelter.
16. With the exception of lazy assholes who don’t want to work, you can fucking starve
2. No Drag Queen will be allowed to be prettier than me, I can handle a chick being prettier than me, but a dude dressed as a chick might be too much for my queenly self esteem to handle.
3. Any drag queen that commits the above crime will be forced to where their grandmothers clothing… from the 80’s, with big chunky head bands (for a year)
4. All religions will be reviewed by a panel of unbiased judges (atheists) and if found to be harmful to anyone besides members of their own religion will be abolished. I say members of their own religion because if you’re crazy enough to consent to something like running bare assed between two rows of people with studded paddles smacking said bare ass as your initiation you deserve it (as long as your over 18). NOTHING that either directly or indirectly harms a child will be permitted.
5. Anyone caught correcting the Empress of Awesomeness or ‘advising’ her of an error on her part will result in the immediate and humiliating punishment of 40 lashes with a wet noodle. (A second offense will result in the perpetrator forced to dance naked through streets of Awesomeland singing Miley Cyrus songs… I’m not joking, unless your super fat, cause nobody wants to see that)
6. Any previously unheard word that comes from the Empress mouth will be immediately posted on dictionary.com with whatever meaning the Empress says it has, so that everyone may enjoy the gems of wisdom that issue from the twisted cavern of her mind.
7. Everyone will be required by law to acknowledge that the Niece of Awesomeness (known to some as Kayleen) is the cutest, smartest, most perfect, little lady that ever there was. (Failure to do this may result in your expulsion from the Awesome planet [previously known as Earth] via the Empresses size twelve boot in your ass [seriously dudes, you’ll end up in the stratosphere])
8. All crimes committed will be severely punished. Seriously, it will mildly nicer than Vlad the Impaler
9. Whatever the Niece of Awesomeness wants, she gets, period.
10. School to at least grade 12 will be Mandatory, there is no excuse for illiteracy.
11. World Hunger will be abolished, by any means necessary
12. Research will be focused on cures for current incurable ailments, and the prevention of catching those incurable ailments, anyone caught creating any type virus or illness will NOT like the consequences
13. There will be a limit to how much any one person can earn in wages per year, no one needs to earn $25 million dollars a year, when there are children starving to death the world over.
14. Every country in the world will use the same currency, and all foods, will hold the same dollar value no matter where it comes from
15. All people will be entitled to not just the basic needs of life, everyone should have enough money for ample food, clean water, clothing, and shelter.
16. With the exception of lazy assholes who don’t want to work, you can fucking starve
Friday, January 23, 2009
Angry Rant: (contains foul language, you are warned)
I have discovered something that spectacularly pisses me off: being cussed out by a perfect stranger over the phone. Now, having never worked for a Technical Support call centre, I have never had someone do this to me before.
What the hell gives someone the right to do that? Was this person raised in a barn? Jesus Christ! And seriously do you want a perfect stranger to know your an ill mannered pig? Save it for your family and friends. God who just starts with the Fuck this and fuck that, and giving me orders? I am like morally offended here!!
(And also please don't point out the fact that I am cussing, because seriously at this point only family and friends read my blog, and they know that I am foul mouthed [except to perfect strangers on the phone cause WHO DOES THAT?]AND I warned you of the impending cursing at the beginning)
What the hell gives someone the right to do that? Was this person raised in a barn? Jesus Christ! And seriously do you want a perfect stranger to know your an ill mannered pig? Save it for your family and friends. God who just starts with the Fuck this and fuck that, and giving me orders? I am like morally offended here!!
(And also please don't point out the fact that I am cussing, because seriously at this point only family and friends read my blog, and they know that I am foul mouthed [except to perfect strangers on the phone cause WHO DOES THAT?]AND I warned you of the impending cursing at the beginning)
Gossip Girl Unawesomeness and Awesomeness
I thought I would give you an example of what I consider an appalling fashion choice:
And know for an awesome fashion choice: (I really like this outfit, it's very sophisticated without being school marmish, it helps that Leighton Meester is a babe)
Both these pictures were taken from here:http://www.gossipgirlinsider.com/
And know for an awesome fashion choice: (I really like this outfit, it's very sophisticated without being school marmish, it helps that Leighton Meester is a babe)
Both these pictures were taken from here:http://www.gossipgirlinsider.com/
Quote of the Day: (from the Monthly TV Show)
Lily: Did you really try to send him anthrax through the mail?
Chuck: The black market's not what it used to be.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, awesome. Have another:
Chuck: If your people don't come up with anything, maybe we can try #26.
Lily: (reading) Crash Jack in plane. The Bass jet is kind of expensive, Charles.
Chuck: There's insurance.
Chuck: The black market's not what it used to be.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, awesome. Have another:
Chuck: If your people don't come up with anything, maybe we can try #26.
Lily: (reading) Crash Jack in plane. The Bass jet is kind of expensive, Charles.
Chuck: There's insurance.
Monthly TV Show Review:
Title: Gossip Girl
Starring: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Ed Westwick, Chace Crawford, Penn Badgley, Taylor Momsen, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle, Connor Paulo
Awesomeness Rating: 4
Review: I read a lot of comments bashing this show, I can’t understand why, I think it’s people reading to much into things, yes it’s over the top, and a little contrived, but for sheer entertainment value it can hardly be beat; The constant backstabbing, and catty arguments are hilarious, the fashion is at times appalling and other times awesome. The acting is better than expected (especially from young Taylor Momsen, even though she seems like kind of an emo slut to me), and most importantly the sheer number of hotties on the show make it worth watching (Ed Westwick? Who is actually English, and supa hot. Chase Crawford? Possibly gay but still adorable) Also, I like how the writers don’t treat everyone like their simpletons, by using words like duplicity (http://www.dictionary.com/). I also Love the song Everytime, by the fictional Gossip Girl band, Linoln Hawk
Starring: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Ed Westwick, Chace Crawford, Penn Badgley, Taylor Momsen, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle, Connor Paulo
Awesomeness Rating: 4
Review: I read a lot of comments bashing this show, I can’t understand why, I think it’s people reading to much into things, yes it’s over the top, and a little contrived, but for sheer entertainment value it can hardly be beat; The constant backstabbing, and catty arguments are hilarious, the fashion is at times appalling and other times awesome. The acting is better than expected (especially from young Taylor Momsen, even though she seems like kind of an emo slut to me), and most importantly the sheer number of hotties on the show make it worth watching (Ed Westwick? Who is actually English, and supa hot. Chase Crawford? Possibly gay but still adorable) Also, I like how the writers don’t treat everyone like their simpletons, by using words like duplicity (http://www.dictionary.com/). I also Love the song Everytime, by the fictional Gossip Girl band, Linoln Hawk
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Antici……….pation
A list of a few things that I am anticipating for the next year:
X-men Origins: Wolverine
Reason: Hugh Jackman ‘nough said… oh and FINALLY the appearance of Gambit (my second favorite Marvel character, Wolvy being my first) who is played by a CANADIAN!! which is awesome.
Fast and The Furious 4
Reason: Vin Diesel and the guaranteed sexy cars (me likey cars) and car chases and what not.
The future ENORMOUS popularity of my blog
Reason: It’s awesome
The Next Celebrity Meltdown
Reason: It provides me with fodder for my awesome blog
Angelina and Brad adopting and or giving birth (Angie not Brad) to ANOTHER child
Reason: It’s inevitable
X-men Origins: Wolverine
Reason: Hugh Jackman ‘nough said… oh and FINALLY the appearance of Gambit (my second favorite Marvel character, Wolvy being my first) who is played by a CANADIAN!! which is awesome.
Fast and The Furious 4
Reason: Vin Diesel and the guaranteed sexy cars (me likey cars) and car chases and what not.
The future ENORMOUS popularity of my blog
Reason: It’s awesome
The Next Celebrity Meltdown
Reason: It provides me with fodder for my awesome blog
Angelina and Brad adopting and or giving birth (Angie not Brad) to ANOTHER child
Reason: It’s inevitable
Quote of the Day!! And Q&A
"I'm a peaceful person, but, frankly, I feel like going over there and applying a fist or two." Brian May
Q&A Part!! (no one has actually asked me this question, but I figure once people discover the awesomeness of my blog, the question is bound to come up, so I should plan ahead)
Q: How does one gain a mention on the Awesomest Blog that ever Awesomed?
A: The criteria for a mention on this blog is as follows:
You must be awesome
or
Supremely mockable (is that a word?)
or
Have enough money for a bribe worthy of a mention on my awesome blog
P.S. Brian May is AWESOME, and if you don't know who Brian May is shame on you. Isn't his hair splendiforous?
Q&A Part!! (no one has actually asked me this question, but I figure once people discover the awesomeness of my blog, the question is bound to come up, so I should plan ahead)
Q: How does one gain a mention on the Awesomest Blog that ever Awesomed?
A: The criteria for a mention on this blog is as follows:
You must be awesome
or
Supremely mockable (is that a word?)
or
Have enough money for a bribe worthy of a mention on my awesome blog
P.S. Brian May is AWESOME, and if you don't know who Brian May is shame on you. Isn't his hair splendiforous?
Unawesome Fugliness
So, since this is a new blog, I haven’t decided what ‘direction’ I want it to go, I’m thinking for now it’ll be whatever I pull out of my *AHEM*.
While reading the MSN Style Winners and Losers list for this week I came across this:
This is one of the most hideous 'dresses' I have ever seen, it looks like she skinned Sasquatch, where the hell is PETA when you need them?
Awesome First Post
In light of this being my very first blog post (which will be awesome) I have elected to share with you, 82 Random things about me (there was going to be 100 but I was doing it at work, and quiting time came, and well... who the hell stays at the office after quiting time?) So, enjoy:
1. I am awesome
2. Heavy use of sarcasm is an integral part of my everyday life
3. Using words like integral makes me feel brainy
4. One of my biggest ‘pet’ peeves is small animals as fashion accessories, I hope the little dog you have pisses in your Luis Vuitton purse
5. I like to read, and am very into series such as: Harry Potter (Don’t roll your eyes at me), The Sword of Truth (awesomeness), and Anita Blake (for the sheer male aesthetics), I also enjoyed The Twilight series ( until I got to the last book, and discovered what a raving stink pot it was, seriously if you’re gonna read the series, stop after the third book, and if you’ve already bought the last book read only the beginning up to the end of the wedding then take it back to the store and use the refund to buy a decent book)
6. I have a favorite movie from like every genre (except porn, I don’t get out that much)
7. I don’t watch much TV but I assure you that the shows I do watch are ripe with awesomeness
8. I spend an abnormal amount of time coming up with ‘perfect’ crimes ( by perfect I mean, me not getting caught and ending up in some female prison as the bitch of a 40 something bull dyke named Big Bertha)
9. I like to write, but usually get a few pages into the “GREATEST NOVEL EVER THOUGHT UP” and lose interest
10. I am a big fan of classic rock, and feel that everyone should love Queen and the Rolling Stones as I do (which is probably too much, and bordering on obsessive)
11. I am a lesson in contradictions as I enjoy playing games such as the Sims and yet still find it completely illogical to waste your life playing a game that has you ‘living’ a life
12. I enjoy knitting and sewing and various other textile arts but am absolute rubbish at completing projects, I get 3/4 of the way done and lose interest (seems to be a theme with me)
13. I have two brothers, to sisters, and two almost sister in laws, that I am quite fond of
14. I get along with my parents (except when I am trying to pry them away from my laptop)
15. I like chocolate way more than is healthy for me
16. I swear a bit (who am I kidding I could put a sailor to shame)
17. My favorite salty snack (get your minds out of the gutter) is popcorn
18. And Miss Vickie’s Sea Salt and Malt Vinegar chips
19. My best friend is my little sister (no one get offended it’s just cause she loves Queen and the Rolling Stones with as much, if not more, fervor than I do)
20. Some of my favorite words are, shenanigans, carousing, and plotz
21. One of my secret vices is Celebrity Best and Worst dressed lists (guess it’s not such a secret anymore)
22. There is only one other female besides me at work and as such there is mucho toilet seat adjustment
23. #22 annoys me to the point of insisting that should I ever leave this job, the next one will have me only work with other women (Stage Manager at Steve’s Boobie/Strip Palace sounds like a glitzy job, and YAY for Employee only bathrooms!!)
24. I have an inexplicable girllycrush on Dita Von Teese
25. The sight of Lindsay Lohan makes me want to throw up in my mouth
26. I’m a big fan of old Hollywood glamour
27. I love my niece more than I ever thought possible and there is NOTHING I wouldn’t do to keep her safe, happy and healthy
28. I like to play World of Warcraft but am thankfully not as enamored with it as some people ( MOM, JESSICA)
29. I have seen Forrest Gump about 17 times
30. I think Alan Rickman is awesome
31. One of my other favorite words is awesome and all it’s derivatives
32. I am a Scorpio
33. Scorpio’s are awesome ;-)
34. I don’t understand certain peoples (and by that I mean Celebrities) desire to give their children humiliating, and future mental illness causing names.
35. I also don’t understand peoples need to change the long standing and perfectly good spellings of names just to make it ‘unique’ nobody knows that your name is unique unless you spell it out every time you introduce yourself. (can you picture it? “Hello my name is Miranda, spelled Mirwhejfuekdanda, the ‘whejfuekd’ is silent. Isn’t that unique?”)
36. Contortionists gross me out (no offense to contortionists)
37. My dream of becoming a celebrity through my awesome blog is unlikely to come to fruition cause I don’t even have a mediocre blog, or… any blog at all
38. I hate hypocrites
39. I hate people that try to force their own beliefs on others, please just accept that some of us don’t want to get up early on Sunday, enjoy celebrating birthdays and Christmas, and after living in the great frozen tundra that is Canada consider an eternity in hell a nice balmy holiday
40. And before you start hating on me for the ‘great frozen tundra’ remark, let me state for the record… I fucking LOVE Canada, I’m just not crazy about our somewhat pansyish government
41. I find it physically and mentally impossible to pick one favorite song
42. I love escargot
43. I hate tomatos, but love Ketchup (there’s that lesson in contradictions thing again)
44. I look ridiculous when phrases such as “what up dog?” and “fo shizz bi-atchs” come out of my mouth ( of course most people look ridiculous when they say that)
45. When life gives you lemons, whip them at the assholes the pissed you off, hope they get juice in their eyes, and carry on your merry way.
46. I have a big thing for accents, especially English, Irish, Scottish, and Australian, I also like Russian
47. Despite living for 23 years with a fairly deranged family I find it difficult to come up with 100 random things about myself
48. I like to shoot pool
49. I have shot a machine gun, and a couple hand guns, and bow and arrows all before the age of about 10 (and no I was not raised in a Ghetto)
50. One of my guiltiest pleasures is … (pfft you didn’t really think I was gonna tell YOU did you?)
51. I once kicked my brother down a flight of stairs… then ran down the stairs and stomped on him while he was laying on the landing writhing in pain (one of my finer moments, I think)
52. Love you Brenty HAAHAHA heh
53. When I was a kid I used to be able to lay on my back on the floor and flip my legs up so my knees touched the floor on either side of my head ( that seemed a lot more innocent when I was a kid, and no I can’t still do it)
54. Are you still reading this? (stalker)
55. I am 3 years, 3 months and 3 days older than my cousin Nikki (she’s good people and I loves her)
56. Her little sister Sammy will perpetually be about 10 years old ( she’s good people too, and I loves her also)
57. I can pretty much count on one hand how many times my hair has not been in a ponytail or some variation of in the last year.
58. I want to travel the world
59. I want to learn another language
60. My dad is the original grumpy old man and has written or rewritten more limericks, rhymes, and songs to be appallingly (and there for hilariously) dirty than anyone I have ever met (He’s awesome)
61. I like the show Freaks and Geeks, seriously dudes, youtube it, if for no other reason than the copious amount of James Franco (yums)
62. Despite my deep and enduring love for James Franco I have only seen parts of one of the spider man movies (mostly cause the dorky whineness of Toby Maguire almost completely negates the hotness of James Franco, I also hate Kirsten Dunst with the heat of a thousand burning suns and think she should’ve quit acting after she reached her peak in Interview with the Vampire, same goes for Tom Cruise)
63. I hate Tom Cruise
64. I think Katie Holmes was entirely the wrong choice for Rachel in Batman Begins and Maggie Gyllenhall ( or however you spell that) wasn’t much better (Michael Caine MAKES those movies, I also love Liam Niesen, and to a lesser extent Christian Bale)
65. Heath Ledger did such an amazing job as the Joker I had to give him his own number
66. I think the best eye candy movies in the history of movies are 300, the Ocean’s Trilogy, and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy
67. I am in love with Johnny Depp and hate hate hate Vanessa Paradise (only cause she’s with him, I’m sure she’s perfectly nice)
68. My very first celebrity crush was Adrian Paul (I was like 7 and he had such pretty hair in Highlander)
69. I have a thing for guys with longish hair
70. I have a problem dating guys that are shorter than me (the problem is that at 6’ it’s hard to find guys taller than me)
71. I hate people that walk slow, especially down the middle of the road, or in parking lots (one of these days I’ma gonna get fed up and just run over your tortoise impersonating ass)
72. I wanna bitch slap Naomi Campbell and Jennifer Lopez … and her ugly ass husband
73. I am a firm believer that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are trying to raise a multicultural army to take over the world (I also find it odd that little Shiloh has such light blonde hair)
74. I can’t wait for the next Fast and the Furious movie to come out (Vin Diesel is a babe)
75. I love history, and learning about other cultures (it amuses me that no matter how “advanced” mankind becomes we are still fighting over the same damn things!!)
76. I think that humans are their own worst enemies and that if there is a God and he is responsible for us having free will, given the current state of the world, he’s probably kicking himself in the ass (cause being god he can totally do that) and so he should
77. I don’t wear jewelry
78. My mom is awesome cause she hates her job and still goes everyday (Mom, when I win the lottery can I be there when you quit?)
79. I like hats
80. I think that the Taj Mahal is one of the most beautiful buildings in the world, I’m also a big fan of Saint Basil’s Cathedral
81. When I’m rich I want to build a replica of the Hanging Gardens of Babylon (doesn’t that sound so pretty?)
82. That’s it can’t think of anymore, tootles
1. I am awesome
2. Heavy use of sarcasm is an integral part of my everyday life
3. Using words like integral makes me feel brainy
4. One of my biggest ‘pet’ peeves is small animals as fashion accessories, I hope the little dog you have pisses in your Luis Vuitton purse
5. I like to read, and am very into series such as: Harry Potter (Don’t roll your eyes at me), The Sword of Truth (awesomeness), and Anita Blake (for the sheer male aesthetics), I also enjoyed The Twilight series ( until I got to the last book, and discovered what a raving stink pot it was, seriously if you’re gonna read the series, stop after the third book, and if you’ve already bought the last book read only the beginning up to the end of the wedding then take it back to the store and use the refund to buy a decent book)
6. I have a favorite movie from like every genre (except porn, I don’t get out that much)
7. I don’t watch much TV but I assure you that the shows I do watch are ripe with awesomeness
8. I spend an abnormal amount of time coming up with ‘perfect’ crimes ( by perfect I mean, me not getting caught and ending up in some female prison as the bitch of a 40 something bull dyke named Big Bertha)
9. I like to write, but usually get a few pages into the “GREATEST NOVEL EVER THOUGHT UP” and lose interest
10. I am a big fan of classic rock, and feel that everyone should love Queen and the Rolling Stones as I do (which is probably too much, and bordering on obsessive)
11. I am a lesson in contradictions as I enjoy playing games such as the Sims and yet still find it completely illogical to waste your life playing a game that has you ‘living’ a life
12. I enjoy knitting and sewing and various other textile arts but am absolute rubbish at completing projects, I get 3/4 of the way done and lose interest (seems to be a theme with me)
13. I have two brothers, to sisters, and two almost sister in laws, that I am quite fond of
14. I get along with my parents (except when I am trying to pry them away from my laptop)
15. I like chocolate way more than is healthy for me
16. I swear a bit (who am I kidding I could put a sailor to shame)
17. My favorite salty snack (get your minds out of the gutter) is popcorn
18. And Miss Vickie’s Sea Salt and Malt Vinegar chips
19. My best friend is my little sister (no one get offended it’s just cause she loves Queen and the Rolling Stones with as much, if not more, fervor than I do)
20. Some of my favorite words are, shenanigans, carousing, and plotz
21. One of my secret vices is Celebrity Best and Worst dressed lists (guess it’s not such a secret anymore)
22. There is only one other female besides me at work and as such there is mucho toilet seat adjustment
23. #22 annoys me to the point of insisting that should I ever leave this job, the next one will have me only work with other women (Stage Manager at Steve’s Boobie/Strip Palace sounds like a glitzy job, and YAY for Employee only bathrooms!!)
24. I have an inexplicable girllycrush on Dita Von Teese
25. The sight of Lindsay Lohan makes me want to throw up in my mouth
26. I’m a big fan of old Hollywood glamour
27. I love my niece more than I ever thought possible and there is NOTHING I wouldn’t do to keep her safe, happy and healthy
28. I like to play World of Warcraft but am thankfully not as enamored with it as some people ( MOM, JESSICA)
29. I have seen Forrest Gump about 17 times
30. I think Alan Rickman is awesome
31. One of my other favorite words is awesome and all it’s derivatives
32. I am a Scorpio
33. Scorpio’s are awesome ;-)
34. I don’t understand certain peoples (and by that I mean Celebrities) desire to give their children humiliating, and future mental illness causing names.
35. I also don’t understand peoples need to change the long standing and perfectly good spellings of names just to make it ‘unique’ nobody knows that your name is unique unless you spell it out every time you introduce yourself. (can you picture it? “Hello my name is Miranda, spelled Mirwhejfuekdanda, the ‘whejfuekd’ is silent. Isn’t that unique?”)
36. Contortionists gross me out (no offense to contortionists)
37. My dream of becoming a celebrity through my awesome blog is unlikely to come to fruition cause I don’t even have a mediocre blog, or… any blog at all
38. I hate hypocrites
39. I hate people that try to force their own beliefs on others, please just accept that some of us don’t want to get up early on Sunday, enjoy celebrating birthdays and Christmas, and after living in the great frozen tundra that is Canada consider an eternity in hell a nice balmy holiday
40. And before you start hating on me for the ‘great frozen tundra’ remark, let me state for the record… I fucking LOVE Canada, I’m just not crazy about our somewhat pansyish government
41. I find it physically and mentally impossible to pick one favorite song
42. I love escargot
43. I hate tomatos, but love Ketchup (there’s that lesson in contradictions thing again)
44. I look ridiculous when phrases such as “what up dog?” and “fo shizz bi-atchs” come out of my mouth ( of course most people look ridiculous when they say that)
45. When life gives you lemons, whip them at the assholes the pissed you off, hope they get juice in their eyes, and carry on your merry way.
46. I have a big thing for accents, especially English, Irish, Scottish, and Australian, I also like Russian
47. Despite living for 23 years with a fairly deranged family I find it difficult to come up with 100 random things about myself
48. I like to shoot pool
49. I have shot a machine gun, and a couple hand guns, and bow and arrows all before the age of about 10 (and no I was not raised in a Ghetto)
50. One of my guiltiest pleasures is … (pfft you didn’t really think I was gonna tell YOU did you?)
51. I once kicked my brother down a flight of stairs… then ran down the stairs and stomped on him while he was laying on the landing writhing in pain (one of my finer moments, I think)
52. Love you Brenty HAAHAHA heh
53. When I was a kid I used to be able to lay on my back on the floor and flip my legs up so my knees touched the floor on either side of my head ( that seemed a lot more innocent when I was a kid, and no I can’t still do it)
54. Are you still reading this? (stalker)
55. I am 3 years, 3 months and 3 days older than my cousin Nikki (she’s good people and I loves her)
56. Her little sister Sammy will perpetually be about 10 years old ( she’s good people too, and I loves her also)
57. I can pretty much count on one hand how many times my hair has not been in a ponytail or some variation of in the last year.
58. I want to travel the world
59. I want to learn another language
60. My dad is the original grumpy old man and has written or rewritten more limericks, rhymes, and songs to be appallingly (and there for hilariously) dirty than anyone I have ever met (He’s awesome)
61. I like the show Freaks and Geeks, seriously dudes, youtube it, if for no other reason than the copious amount of James Franco (yums)
62. Despite my deep and enduring love for James Franco I have only seen parts of one of the spider man movies (mostly cause the dorky whineness of Toby Maguire almost completely negates the hotness of James Franco, I also hate Kirsten Dunst with the heat of a thousand burning suns and think she should’ve quit acting after she reached her peak in Interview with the Vampire, same goes for Tom Cruise)
63. I hate Tom Cruise
64. I think Katie Holmes was entirely the wrong choice for Rachel in Batman Begins and Maggie Gyllenhall ( or however you spell that) wasn’t much better (Michael Caine MAKES those movies, I also love Liam Niesen, and to a lesser extent Christian Bale)
65. Heath Ledger did such an amazing job as the Joker I had to give him his own number
66. I think the best eye candy movies in the history of movies are 300, the Ocean’s Trilogy, and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy
67. I am in love with Johnny Depp and hate hate hate Vanessa Paradise (only cause she’s with him, I’m sure she’s perfectly nice)
68. My very first celebrity crush was Adrian Paul (I was like 7 and he had such pretty hair in Highlander)
69. I have a thing for guys with longish hair
70. I have a problem dating guys that are shorter than me (the problem is that at 6’ it’s hard to find guys taller than me)
71. I hate people that walk slow, especially down the middle of the road, or in parking lots (one of these days I’ma gonna get fed up and just run over your tortoise impersonating ass)
72. I wanna bitch slap Naomi Campbell and Jennifer Lopez … and her ugly ass husband
73. I am a firm believer that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are trying to raise a multicultural army to take over the world (I also find it odd that little Shiloh has such light blonde hair)
74. I can’t wait for the next Fast and the Furious movie to come out (Vin Diesel is a babe)
75. I love history, and learning about other cultures (it amuses me that no matter how “advanced” mankind becomes we are still fighting over the same damn things!!)
76. I think that humans are their own worst enemies and that if there is a God and he is responsible for us having free will, given the current state of the world, he’s probably kicking himself in the ass (cause being god he can totally do that) and so he should
77. I don’t wear jewelry
78. My mom is awesome cause she hates her job and still goes everyday (Mom, when I win the lottery can I be there when you quit?)
79. I like hats
80. I think that the Taj Mahal is one of the most beautiful buildings in the world, I’m also a big fan of Saint Basil’s Cathedral
81. When I’m rich I want to build a replica of the Hanging Gardens of Babylon (doesn’t that sound so pretty?)
82. That’s it can’t think of anymore, tootles
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